How to combat your neurodivergent students’ social skills regression.

Before stay-at-home orders had gone into effect, I went to the doctor’s office for my yearly check-up, and the nurse told me that I was going to have x-rays done. When the x-ray technician walked in, she said, “Today is picture day for you!” I replied, “Great! That is the reason I wore my favorite shirt!” This started a conversation about clothing that lasted the entire time I was having my x-rays done.

Now, as we all are physically distant from one another, we have less opportunities to practice our communication skills. Many educators (and parents) fear that COVID-19 shutdowns and service suspensions will lead to social skills regression in their neurodivergent students and might not know what they can do to help.

First, hold a practice conversation with your students via a videoconferencing service. How proficient are they at extending conversations? Do they often hold a conversation after the initial “Hello!” or “Good morning!”?

As your students become more comfortable opening or starting a conversation, their next step is being able to extend the conversation beyond a one or two sentence exchange. Being able to extend the conversation can help make you a more desirable person with whom to talk.

A great way to do this is to bring in a guest speaker to your virtual classroom to speak on a topic that is of interest to your students or pertains to the curriculum’s current subject matter. During the guest speaker’s visit, have your students complete the following five parts on a worksheet:

1️. Look at the speaker.

When listening to someone, encourage your students to use the three-second eye method. For three seconds, look at the speaker’s left eye. After that, look at the speaker’s right eye. Then, look at the speaker’s mouth. Return to the left eye, right eye, and mouth pattern. This allows you to maintain (or what appears to be) eye contact.

2️. Ask open-ended questions that start with “Who?”, “When?”, “What?”, “How?”, “Where?” to extend a conversation.

As you get more comfortable, try using more advanced extenders that start with, “Do you have…?”, “Are you…?”, or “How often…?” Have each student prepare at least one question.

3️. Provide one comment that pertains to something the person you are talking to said.

By providing a comment, your students are able to interact on a more personal level with the speaker.

4️. Provide one positive non-verbal cue.

Non-verbal cues are “body language” that says far more than words and shows the person you are speaking with that you are listening and engaged with the conversation. A smile, 👌sign, nod of the head, or a thumbs up are all great non-verbal cues your students can use!

5. Afterward, discuss one “knowledge nugget” gained from the speaker.

This provides you an opportunity to reflect and respond on the topic of what was heard rather than think the speaker’s topic had no relevance. Remember: each of us can learn something from every person we speak with, we just need to be open enough to let the learning occur.

Educators (and parents), are you helping your neurodivergent students maintain and improve their communication skills, despite the physical distancing mandates? What methods or techniques are working for you and your students?