Old NAVY vs. New NAVY: How Volunteering Can Make You a Better Communicator
A few weeks ago, I had the opportunity to present at Milestones Autism Resources’ National Autism Conference, #MNAC2019. It was such an encouraging and uplifting experience! I have been to conferences where people just go to go; but, at this conference, everybody seemed very interested in being there and learning something.
It was also great to meet so many people driving change within the ASD community, and one of the most impactful interactions I had at the conference was with one of my volunteers. During my presentation, I always provide an opportunity for a volunteer to come on stage and participate in a number of different exercises. At one point, when trying to illustrate how body language and tone is more important than words in a conversation, I made a call for volunteers, and there was one enthusiastic man in particular whose hand immediately shot up.
Near the end of the exercise, I asked him, “How was your day?”
“Well, let’s see,” he responded. “The first panel I did wasn’t very fun, and then this happened! And, so far, it’s been a pleasant surprise.”
The experience reminded me of myself, albeit in a different way. When I doubted my communication skills, I never volunteered. At meetings or conferences, I was the last to volunteer for anything. If the assignment asked for a volunteer, I would close my eyes (believing that “if I cannot see them, then they cannot see me”) or take an immediate interest in retying my shoes. These tactics were quite effective — very seldom was I chosen!
I lived by a simple acronym: NAVY (Never Again Volunteer Yourself).
By not volunteering, I was “safe,” so to speak. In my comfort zone, I did not have to worry about messing up or saying the wrong thing, but now it haunts me: how many opportunities did I miss out on?
How about you? How many times have you had the chance to volunteer, chose not to, and then watched as somebody else was given a coffee cup or a t-shirt or was simply recognized and given the opportunity to go on stage? How did that make you feel?
If you want to build your self-confidence and improve your communication skills, consider a new NAVY: Now Actively Volunteer Yourself.
Just like the volunteer at my presentation, you may very well be surprised at how doing something like volunteering can build the self-confidence needed to be a better, more effective communicator. Volunteering provides you the opportunity to practice your communication skills, learn from your successful or less-than-successful attempts, and compels you to keep on trying until you can perform the skill on a regular basis.
Sure, volunteering can be scary — putting yourself in front of others opens you up to both negative and positive results — but it is the only way you will be able to improve.
By making the choice to now actively volunteer yourself, I went from someone who never participated in activities to serving on a judging panel at a local competition. At this competition in particular, they decided to have just one judge ask everyone’s questions. I immediately volunteered, questions were handed to me, and I provided a few of my own. After the competition, as I walking around waiting for the results, a few people approached me and told me how thought provoking my questions were.
What does that mean for you? Start small. If a teacher asks a question, raise your hand. If someone in the group needs to take notes, be that person. As your confidence grows, tackle bigger challenges. Volunteer to participate in the activity in the front of the lecture hall or to lead next month’s work meeting.
By volunteering, you might earn yourself a free t-shirt or beach ball; but, more importantly, you will be better equipped to be a contributing member to conversations with your family, friends, coworkers, and society.
What NAVY are you a part of? List the actions you will take to make yourself volunteer more.